I'm What?!

My husband and I were married seven months when I became pregnant with our first child, Grace. She was seven months old when I became pregnant with our second child, another girl, Joy. When she was seven months old, my husband wasn't allowed close enough to even shake hands.

We had a third child a few years later, one more girl- Gloria, and felt we were probably done. Surgery is so finite though, so no extreme measures were taken to secure this. We had always joked about a mid-life crisis child, but as mid-life approached we became reassured that we were ready to definitely claim no more children. Quite simply, we liked our sleep. After being asked constantly about the possibilities of having a fourth to try for a boy, we were tired of making excuses.

What is the saying? Man makes plans and God laughs? Well, we made plans. We planned on traveling. We planned on more date nights. We planned mostly to have more time together as a married couple, something we have had far too little of. This was declared and celebrated earlier this year in honor of our mutually approaching fortieth birthdays. We definitely planned on NOT having any more children.

In April, I was a few days late. No worries. I'll take a test just for peace of mind and calm the queasy stomach.

Four tests later, it was obvious. God was laughing. Big time.

After the first test, I quietly walked into the living room and requested my husband's presence in the bathroom for a moment. He followed me in, took the test questioningly, recognized the significance, and began to claim it wasn't a positive test- I was just misreading.

Oh, Men. You boys can be so cute when reality smacks you upside the head and you want to deny it, argue it, and prove it wrong. Your voices get higher pitched, the sweat on the forehead beads so handsomely, and the increase in pulse rate gives you such attractive jitters. When will you learn, when we women say "Yes it is" while in shock and blinking back stinging tears- we really mean "Yes it is and if you doubt me, you will make me feel crazy and I may jump on your back and cut you while screaming like a Banshee!! "?

To assuage the increasingly desperate denial, a second test was taken. Reference on reading the test accurately was googled and debated. The agreed upon next action was the acquisition of a more identifiable test, preferably one that said "Yes" or "No". Much to my surprise on the update of technology in the eight years since my previous pregnancy, they have a digital test that actually declares "Yes" or "No" now. Although, I am not sure what the "No" looks like. Both of mine said "Yes" most definitely.

After 48 hours of shock and some much needed listening by my sisters of the heart, I was ready to admit this was it- I would be pregnant on my 40th Birthday. My days of sleeping are once again numbered. Our plans of traveling are placed on hold and our time alone will be extended by another 18 years.

It has been over a month now since the discovery of our new family member. The newness of the idea has worn off. The third trimester's ending is being greatly anticipated in hopes that food will once again be welcomed in my body. And I have learned to grow patient with the first question that everyone seems to ask me:

When will you find out if this one's a boy?